Last Night I Met Jesus

Protect Our Children Flower bedI have never met Jesus.

Last night, I met a man badly shamed in his childhood. He sat in His humble chair.  He honored me as I washed His feet there.   I met Jesus last night.

I have never hugged Jesus.

Last night, I hugged a full grown man.  Wounds of shame from long long ago still fresh on his mind.  He sat in His well-worn chair.  He graced me with the chance to wash His feet there.  I hugged Jesus last night.

I have never seen Jesus.

Last night, I saw a woman with deep trauma from her youth.   She sat in Her nondescript chair.  She allowed me to gently wash Her feet there.  I saw Jesus last night.

I have never been hugged by Jesus.

Last night, a woman hugged me and violently sobbed as she did.  She sat in Her old lawn chair.  She gave me the honor to wash Her feet there.  Last night, Jesus hugged me very tight.

Last night has passed.  Such a sweet peaceful night.  Is Jesus real?  Well….to this much I CAN attest.  I have met Him.  I have hugged Him.  I have seen Her.  She hugged me tight as She sobbed and sobbed and sobbed.

Today, I mourn that I can’t meet LeeAnn.  I can’t hug LeeAnn.  Assualted by her bishop at 14, the shame was too great.  Her life was taken by her own hand.  Oh…that She could sit in Her old lawn chair.  Oh…that I could tenderly wash Her feet there.

Today, I mourn that I can’t see Sam.  I can’t be tightly hugged by this innocent young man.  Shamed and bullied he took is own life when merely 14.  Oh…that He could sit in His humble chair.  What an honor it would be to wash His feet there.


14 Year Old Destroyed by Her Bishop-Today, I Honor LeeAnn


Heart-rending to look at the valiant officer in the picture and then to know her history.  This is story #370 on

This is not my story. This is my sister’s story. But she is not here to tell it. My younger sister LeeAnn became a “special project” of her Bishop _____ in Florida. She was neither his first nor his last victim. Bishop _____ convinced my blindly obedient mother that LeeAnn needed to come live with him for special care. He started raping her several months shy of her 15th birthday. The abuse continued. My sister begged my mother to be allowed to come back home but my mother refused saying that Bishop  was____ a man of god. Her fellow mormon congregants in Florida knew what was happening but blamed my sister rather than the bishop. LeeAnn was finally able to break free when she went away for college. But as you can imagine, the damage was severe and deep. She was unable to have children of her own.

She became a police officer in an attempt to protect others from the evil she had endured. When I learned of this whole thing later (I was older and lived in Colorado at the time), I was racked with guilt, though my sister assured me that there was nothing I could have done. She said that the only thing that she wanted was for our mother to apologize to her for forcing her to live with a pedophile rapist. That apology never came.

On December 25th 2015, LeeAnn took her life. My mother actually attended a Mormon church in my sister’s neighborhood on the date of the memorial service. When my other sister asked my mother why she did not protect LeeAnn, my mother stated to this sister that she thought about turning the rapist in but then felt too guilty because he was called of god.

PLEASE do whatever you can to protect the vulnerable from the predators.

LeeAnn the Good Samaritan

In February 2015, this article was published by AzCentral, Glendale Police Office Helped Family Get Off the Street.  Ten months later, LeeAnn took her own life.

The raw and gaping wounds of our friends, who once were children, are now out in the open for all to read and to see.

On March 30, 2018, I and 1,000 others will honor LeeAnn’s memory by delivering her story to the headquarter steps of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.   What happened to her at the hands of her bishop will not be forgotten.  What has happened to thousands of other Mormon children behind-closed-doors will no longer be swept under the rug.

Glimpses into LeeAnn’s life

For those who are wondering what a 14 year old looks like. This is a picture of LeeAnn visiting her sister.


LeeAnn and and her niece.


A beautiful synagogue in Park City has a brick walkway.  This is the brick that her sister  installed to honor a precious person no longer in our midst.


Join Our Historic March-For-The-Children

If you are in Utah, within driving distance, or even flying distance, come help us assure that the children of the future don’t repeat the dreadful experiences of children in our past.

On March 30, 2018 we will gather at the Salt Lake City/County Building.  Then march 5 blocks to the LDS Church Office Building.  Upon arrival, we will present 2 items to church officials:

  • The signatories on the Petition to Protect The Children–Stop Sexually Explicit Interviews of Mormon Youth
  • Sacred Stories of Sacred Children.  A record of childhoods destroyed behind closed doors.

Register here so we can get an accurate count ahead of time.  Our goal is 1,000 marchers.

How can you help protect our children:

  • Share the march info everywhere.
  • Bring your friends & family.
  • Encourage friends & family in Utah and surrounding states to join us.

We are making Mormon history.  Come make it with us.  It will be a once in a lifetime event.

Local Rallies

Many friends of Protect-The-Children who want to come to the march are constrained by time, distance, or money.

Good News!!!  We are organizing local rallies in offsite locations to coincide with the Utah march.  Same date, same time…different place.  Imagine 20 people in Seattle, 30 in Dallas, 25 in St. Louis and so on and so on and so on!

Every place we have a gathering, local media will be invited to cover.  We are expecting the national media to be at the SLC event.  The local rallies will illustrate in a big way that our cause is a country-wide movement and deserves national attention.

This will be a big step in bringing awareness to good Mormon parents and bishops everywhere.  So far, our efforts have reached some.  The march will extend our reach many times over.

If you are interested in participating in a local rally, please register here.  A volunteer coordinator will reach out to you soon.

Come help us save our children!!!  Whether it be at Church Headquarters or at local venues all across the country, your efforts will protect generations of children to come.




Is there a Human Being on the Planet…

Lion Innocence…who wouldn’t be devastated by this?

I bawled my eyes out.  It took me three attempts to watch the video before I could watch to the end.

This story was shared today on  I spoke with the dad by phone.  How does anyone recover from this?

I did lose a 14 year old son to suicide in 2014, this petition is correct about the risk of suicide attached to these interviews.

In my most painful moments searching for what sparked my Samuel’s end of life decision, the issues presented in this petition quickly rose high on the list to investigate. Not just one, but two Bishop’s testified while speaking at his funeral just how conscientious Samuel was during his Bishop’s interviews with them. Also comments in his chat logs before he died hint that he was effected by these interviews.

After over 3 years of grueling and intense research and pondering to understand, I place these interviews and the feelings of shame they produce as a major reason for his end of life decision. My haunting regrets tell me he might still be alive if I had not required that he participate in these interviews, God knows how I wished I had a Sam Young to enlighten me before his death.

*** Samuel’s video is the heart-breaker ***


These Interviews Stop NOW!

It’s not just Sam Young….There are now 11,449 thundering voices that will NOT be silenced.  Our cherished children are at stake.

Other Resources

A Tale of Two Talkerias


The best of times and the worst of times.

Recently, two Talkerias were held on consecutive nights.  The people who attended were amazing.  Good-hearted.  Smart.  Thoughtful.  Many shed tears as they recounted their narratives.  Some for the very first time.

Two stories came out of them that I’m going to share.  One terrifying.  One terrific.

A Terrifying Tale

One of this weekend’s attendees shared this heart rending story.

Recently, she had accompanied a close friend to pick up her son at the airport.  He had been sent home early from his full-time mission.  Why?  Multiple…suicide…attempts.  The last one was nearly fatal.

Why was this young Elder so distraught?  Masturbation.  He was not able to eradicate it.  Heaps of shame and guilt had brought him to the brink of death.

How tragic.  How long will it take for this kid to overcome the shame that was totally unnecessary?  This natural and normal practice was not the sin.  The sin rests squarely on the hands of the shaming church.

A Terrific Tale

At the end of the next meeting, one of the men said, “Sam, thanks for helping me and my son with Bippity-Bop.”  I asked him to explain.  Later that night, this response showed up.

Growing up, I was a pretty good kid.  I did not curse, I was ‘chaste.’  I was an Eagle Scout.  I genuinely looked for ways to give service.  I was also kind.  I have always had a soft spot in my heart for the under dog.  I have literally never broken the word of wisdom.  I am not saying this to brag.  For this to make sense, I think you need to know who I was.  I mean I had perfect attendance at Seminary and served on the Stake Youth Executive Committee.

And…do you know what I thought of myself?  I was garbageI loathed myself through my teen years and my early adulthood.  I was right up there with the sons of perdition.  My bishop told me that if I could not get my filthy habit under control, I would be excluded from a mission.  And…that no woman would ever want me. 

Anyway, I resolved sometime back, that this would not happen to my sons.  In the last year, my 14yo came to me and was pretty upset.  His oldest bother had been caught in the act by his mother (my ex) and step father.  They threatened to take his bedroom door away and lots of other shamey stuff.  He is teased about it a lot.  The 14yo was upset about how his brother was being treated.  This allowed us to have a conversation about it.  I assured him that it was normal and healthy and what the ground rules were:  do it in private and clean up after yourself. 

I have doubted myself a lot since that conversation and wondered if I was leading my kid to hell.  Your posts gave the assurance and talked through the logic enough that I am glad for him and for the conversations we have been able to have.  Since then, we have had a conversation about this not being anyone else’s business.  If he needs to remind anyone of that, including the bishop, I will back him.

In a somewhat humorous twist, he is now hoping he gets asked so he can say, “Dude, what kind of a sicko talks to kids about that?”  However he handles it, I am on his side.  He won’t be getting any shame from this house.  The great thing about not shaming my kid is that we talk about all sorts of things, now that the door is open.  Thank you!

Dear Parents

Will you open the door to a potentially terrifying tale of shame for your child?

Or will you close the shaming door and protect your young ones from a damaged childhood?

It’s up to you.   It’s your call.  It’s your responsibility.

Other Resources

“Talk to Your Kids About Masturbation” …click HERE

“Bippity Bop, A Sin It’s Not” …click HERE

Suicide Vote


If I Don’t Dissent….I Consent

Well….I don’t consent.  No way am I going to dismiss the dreadful suicide rates documented by the CDC.  It’s a shame and a stain on my church.

The LGBT policies of the LDS church are, at best, purely temporary.  A modern apostle taught us this fact.  You can find his words detailed HERE.

These policies are not binding on the church until they are presented for a vote and sustained by the majority.  This is a restored principle of the restored church.  The prophet Joseph F. Smith testified before the U.S. Congress that this is the way the church functions.  His testimony is recorded HERE.

A Driving Force Behind Gay Suicides

I have a friend in Utah County who is an ardent advocate and protector of gay kids.  The Provo area can be particularly hard on LGBT as the density of the Mormon faith is so intense there.  He explained something I’d never heard before:

“Gay kids are taught that they have to endure this life in complete celibacy.  When they eventually die, they will be resurrected with the ‘normal and proper’ heterosexual feelings.  In the next world, they will be ‘fixed.’  But…in the meantime, they must endure the next 70 to 80 years with no expression of their gay inclinations.  No hand holding.  No hugging.  No dating.  No kissing.  No romance.  No romantic love.  No intimacy.  No marriage.  No hope for any of this.  The ideation then goes something like this.  ‘If I will be changed to a normal person after I die, why wait 80 years?  Why not end the suffering, the rejection, the hopelessness?  I’ve prayed to be changed.  It hasn’t worked.  But, I know how I can be changed.  I have to die.'”

It’s not the gay kids that need to change.  It’s the policies, teachings and attitudes of the institution that need to change.  They aren’t even real policies.  Only temporary!!!

Gay kids need sympathetic support.  Not suicidal support.  At April’s General Conference, I will exercise my right, privilege and responsibility to vote opposed.  If it saves one LBGT youth from suicide…the shunning & temple recommend loss that I endure, will all be well worth it.

Over 45 years ago, I witnessed the beating of a poor innocent mentally challenged kid.  Essentially, I consented to his beating by standing on the sidelines and uttering no protest.  I have deep, deep regrets, which are recoreded HERE.  I’m not going to make another dreadful blunder by standing on the sidelines as suicides soar.

To read a fuller analysis of Utah’s teen suicides and their link to the church’s LGBT policies, this is a great SITE.  The author put together the graph above from data provided by the CDC website.


Fortunately, I’m not alone.  There are now 322 of us living the law of common consent and voting opposed.

Join us.

You can start HERE.

Other Resources

  • Common Consent Scriptures & Doctrine, click HERE.
  • Common Consent Register—A Record of Those Who Disapprove, click, HERE.
  • Email notifications that can be sent to Bishops and Stake Presidents, click HERE.
  • Do We Love Jesus Enough?, click HERE.
  • The Only True Hope for The Only True Church, click HERE.
  • If I Don’t Dissent…I Consent, click HERE.