My Fellow Disconsolate

hands

Are you suffering dreadful heartache? Are you crying inside? Are you shedding tears of grief, sadness and loss?  If you are, you are not alone.  I’m right there with you, my friend.  You, me…we share something in common.  It may not emanate from the same source.  But, if you are in any kind of profound grief, I’m there with you, right now.

I can’t predict when this deep anguish will come over me. But, it has heaped itself with a vengeance today.  I can’t seem to shake this soul crushing gloom.  So, I’m going to share it…in hopes that there might be one other person in our community who needs companionship and empathy at this very moment.

Today, I’ve been at the office. After 2 weeks of huge distractions (Hurricane Harvey), my business needs serious attention.  Now, I sit here at a very late lunch.  Chick-fil-A.  Tears just keep streaming.  Oh…the damn loss of what I have dedicated my whole life to.  Literally, my whole life.  Ahead of family.  Ahead of career. Ahead of everything. And…I KNEW that my priorities were right.  Oh crap!

I was lied to.  I was misled.  I was blind.  Now, I’m not.  I wouldn’t want to undo my sight if I could.  I had friends.  I had purpose.  I had community.  I had standing.  All sacrificed in order to seek and embrace new truth.  But, that damn loss is so damn crushing.  Today, the sledge hammer of bereavement is pounding hard.

So, my struggling friend, I’m taking your hand in mine. I’m squeezing it. Squeezing with understanding, empathy and love. May we both know that sorrow is okay.  May we both know that it will pass.

Perhaps this will be a fitting end for my post.  I just realized that in addition to my eyes, my nose is crying too.  Time to clean up, before I look like a complete baby in the booth.

I love you my friend….whoever you might be.