The title above turns my stomach. This is my damn church. What the hell are we doing!!!
During my brother’s full-time mission, he was called to serve as a zone leader. One of his responsibilities: take other teenage full-time missionaries behind closed doors and ask them is they masturbate. What the hell!!!
A teenager being tasked by his mission president to ask other teenagers “specific and explicit” sexual questions. This doesn’t qualify as inappropriate. IT….IS….HORRENDOUS.
Here’s a snippet of our recent conversation:
ME: How did you feel about that?
BRO: It was weird. I hated those interviews. Prying and asking those questions.
ME: Did any of the boys say they masturbated?
BRO: Uhhh….yes!
ME: What did you tell them?
BRO: Ummmm….Well….To stop doing it.
Dear General Authorities
When you give Seventies, Stake Presidents and Mission Presidents the directive to be “specific and explicit,” horrific unintended consequences are the result.
“Specific and explicit” questioning of our children has become a rampant practice. It is disgusting and dead wrong. All done behind closed doors, all alone with our precious children. STOP IT.
And then, to find out that you have tasked our teenage children to do the exact same thing. SHAME ON YOU.
I invite you so sign the petition that has now been signed by 1,949 concerned human beings. Click HERE for the petition link.
Other Resources
Petition: Protect Our Children–Stop Mormon Masturbation Interviews. Click HERE.
Why this petition matters. Click HERE.
Testimonials of masturbation interviews. Click HERE.
Testimonials of interviews about orgasm and sexual positions. Click HERE.
How to talk to your kids about masturbation. Click HERE.
Is masturbation a sin? Click HERE.
Tocubit Is Invisible's Cubit 
You should go to the news media & let them get the word out. Perhaps then the church authorities will listen.
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Well, it may come to that. I have been voting and speaking out for 2 years. Now the petition. Next…..
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This. Publicity they do listen to.
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Oh My Gosh!! This is despicable! My sons and my grandson were all zone leaders and the thought of any of them being charged with asking explicit sexual questions of other humans turns my stomach. And, who the hell asks these questions of the sisters?? The ZL? The MP?? Geez almighty.
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Who asks the sisters? Good question.
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I don’t think people outside of Mormonism really care that much. Their attitude is ” well yeah Mormonism is a stupid shit pile of a religion. Just get the hell out of it.”
If only they knew.
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If I read this right, it happened over 40 years ago. Is there any other examples of this occurring in the last few years. Maybe this MP learned lesson and didn’t ask this again. Time to call down and see what is happening now. The article I posted yesterday said that bishops, stake presidents should stick to the the standard questions from the letter and handbook.
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The article said “standard questions.” It did not say to “stick” with them. I basically said the opposite in the appendix. There are no standard questions in the handbook for youth interviews.
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About 35 years ago. MMM happened 160 years ago. The 120 murders that were committed at the direction of church leaders should still be disgusting. For me, the time that has passed is not the point of the article. It’s that it happened at all. And to my own brother. Instructions are given to our leaders by their leaders behind closed doors. No transparency. Bad things always seem to happen when there are shrouds of secrecy.
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There are so many different versions of the MMM, I wouldn’t know where to start on that one. You can go to the Bishop and ask him what questions he asks, if he won’t tell you, then let the parents in the ward know.
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Is there some place where the general membership can read the “standard questions” used for various interviews?
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Not for youth interviews.
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There are no standard questions to interview youth. Rarely does a question about chasity come up unless ones intuition indicates otherwise. Or the youth brings it up. Scary descriptions of hot lamps and perverted adult males getting stimulated from invasive/detailed sexual inquiries is silly.
This blog is turning into a “hole poking” tirade rather than a forum for constructive dialog.
The headlines are like Fox News bating.
Hole pokers are negative, angry and low ballers. Let’s move away from it and refocus on the now and what can we collectively do to make constructive changes.
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Suggestions?
I have spoken to my local leaders for 2 years. I’ve voted opposed for 2 years. I’ve spoken out about it for the past year. I have written and written and written my heart out. No avail…nothing.
Angry? You are damn right that I’m angry. My child was taken behind a closed door, by an adult authority figure, all alone with my little girl and asked if she masturbated!!! That’s all I need. If you think that I’m a hole poking, negative, angry, low baller…call me whatever you like. I call the practice EVIL!!! It is happening over and over and over again. Every week. Every month. Year after year after year. This morning I received another first had report of it happening yesterday. The person was devastated. I have tons of stories of these sexually abusive interviews occurring. But, I don’t need anybody else’s stories. My child was harmed. I was never asked if this was OK for my child. I certainly didn’t give my permission. Frankly, I don’t want my anger to dissipate until this EVIL practice is killed. My grandchildren are now coming into the cross hairs of this pernicious practice.
Now, my friend, besides a petition, what would you suggest to bring a rapid halt to all this.
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I believe the bishops should ask the parents for permission to ask this question and to suggest to the parent that they broach the subject with their child prior to the interview. Masturbation is a huge problem in the church that follows the youth from the time they start the habit, thru their mission and into their marriage. I personally feel it is sinful. I know for some that this is too harsh. Most of those are men. I do agree with Sam that parents should accompany their child to any interview behind closed doors.
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Yay! We now have several pages in common. Of course, we also have a whole book in common…The Teachings and Example of Jesus Christ. I really admire your spunk to stay in the fray.
Last night, I was highly criticized and several people piled on. It made me want to quit everything that I’m doing.
But WWJD…What would Janice do? She wouldn’t let anyone knock her down without picking herself right back up and putting up those powerful dukes of hers.
Love you my friend.
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I really appreciate all that you are doing and the tremendous amount of time that you have invested in this great work. It is totally and completely inexcusable for this to be going on at all on any level. All parents of all children should absolutely refuse to allow these interviews to take place. Also, God gave each of us a brain and the ability to think. Not one of us should ever turn over our thinking abilities to anyone else, regardless of the title in front of their name; weather it be bishop, stake president, elder, general authority or prophet.
Let us remember Warren Jeffs. He had the word “prophet” in front of his name and as a direct result of this was able to, among many other disgusting and deplorable things, rape a 12 year old girl (whom he claimed as a “wife”). One of the most offensive and unbelieveable things about this is that the people who should have protected “all” of the girls from this pedophile (the parents, the adults in the community} were looking through adulterated glasses and thought of Warren Jeffs as the spoke person for God. They were incapable of seeing him for what he is and was, a pedophile. We need to be able to see beyond the title of these people doing the interviews and as parents say “NO, IT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE”
Once again thank you Sam Young.
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That question should not EVER be asked. Period. I can’t believe you think it should be asked under any circumstances!
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I believe the bishops should ask the parents for permission to ask this question and to suggest to the parent that they broach the subject with their child prior to the interview. Masturbation is a huge problem in the church that follows the youth from the time they start the habit, thru their mission and into their marriage. I personally feel it is sinful. I know for some that this is too harsh. Most of those are men. I do agree with Sam that parents should accompany their child to any interview behind closed doors.
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Here’s another harm I haven’t seen anyone else discuss (and this has happened to me):
Inappropriate relationships developing between bishops and teenage/YSA/YA women.
Questions about sex and masturbation sometimes segue into priesthood leaders talking about their own sexuality or commenting on the interviewees’ body, future sex life, or attractiveness.
I was single long enough and lived with other LDS singles long enough to hear about single women fantasizing about bishops, having bishops describe their sex lives in detail, talk about who they’d like to havevsex with, etc. all kinds of inappropriate bonds can be formed by these originally inappropriate questions over time.
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Super good point!!!
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