Tag: Stake President

President…Take the LEAD! Members are Joining the Cause.

Change-AheadDear President ______,

I just received this eloquent and powerful message from an active and committed member of our church.

Dear Sam,

Thank you for your bravery in this very disturbing issue. What you are doing cannot be easy for you, your wife, or your family.

Both the children, and the church’s good name need to be protected by what you are doing.

I love the church and the gospel very much and I also care very deeply for the well being of our youth.

If policy is not changed as you suggest, I fear both our children and our church’s good name will be in jeopardy.

There are so many people who need to hear the gospel and may not be open and willing to allow their families to learn if these practices stay in place.

One of the main principles of the church is that families can live together forever. We are all working towards being together as a family with our Heavenly Father because we love Him and them so much. He has given us these perfect beings that are truly His children first. They are just on loan to us, but we love them dearly, and we are charged by Him to make sure they return home to Him, to keep them safe BOTH spiritually and physically.

It is my belief that this is the highest calling that we can have on earth.
What you are doing supports that work, the gospel, and the integrity of the church.

Thank you.

President, don’t let the Church’s good name be harmed.  Don’t allow further damage to be done to our children.

National media are going to eat this up.  Our non-Mormon neighbors are going to throw up.  Bishops and many good members are already calling for these changes to be made…or making the changes themselves.

You are a good and righteous man!  Join me at the news conference.  Call for the protection of our children.

Love and best wishes,

Sam

President–Join me at the News Conference

Lion Protecting CubsDear President________,

A sitting Bishop and his 2 counselors have just signed the petition!!!

That makes 3 active bishops who have signed.

In mid-January, a ward right here in Houston made the petition changes.  The bishop happens to be a very close relative to one of the apostles.

And…there is one entire stake that has made major changes to protect their children.  I sent you all the details a couple of weeks ago.

Changes are coming, my friend.  I invite you again to take the lead.  Let’s be proactive and make the changes.  There are many members in our stake who have signed the petition.  They and everyone else would be completely supportive of you!!

All my best wishes,

Sam

P.S. Before I could send this, I received word of another sitting bishop who wants the petition to succeed.

 

 

 

Sam: Protect our Children! Mormon Church: Apostate!

Sacred StoriesThursday, January 25, 2018, I met with my Stake President(SP) and Bishop(BP) to discuss my concerns about youth interviews.  The meeting lasted 3 hours.  These are very good men.  I would vouch for them anywhere.  The Stake President is the local representative who speaks on behalf of the Church with regards to me.

At the outset, I asked if they were recording the interview.  I believe that on two occasions, my phone conversations with Church headquarters have been recorded.  The SP assured me that he was not recording.

I told them that on three recent occasions, during meetings with Church representatives, I have been told that the conversations were to remain private.  This, even though the discussions were about church policy.  No longer am I willing to keep private things that are not private.  I told the SP this and then asked if he would like me to record the meeting.  That way, when I wrote or talked about it, I wouldn’t get anything wrong.  He asked me not to record it.  I didn’t.

I then presented the book ‘Sacred Stories of Sacred Children.’  It contains 250 stories of horrendous consequences suffered by our youth.  They quickly flipped through the book, not stopping to read.  Both the BP and SP said that they believe the stories.  That was very good news.  I could only guess that they had read them elsewhere.

I briefly described a few of the stories.  Instances of sexual assault by bishops, suicide and severe trauma.  The SP responded, “Shame on those men.”  Well, I certainly agree with that.  And I take it one step further, “Shame on the system that enabled the actions of these men.”

At that point, I invited them to join with me to protect the children.  That invitation was quickly brushed off the table for any consideration.

Then we launched into a long back and forth about why I thought the current policies are dangerous and damaging.  Followed by their defense as to why they are necessary and good.  Conclusion?  No changes will be made.

During this discussion, they brought up two valid points that I agree need to be addressed.

  1. My writings were hurting people.  I asked, “Who am I hurting?”  The SP said that I’d hurt him.  He then read from my most recent email to him.  It had hurt his feelings to the core.  I could see that.  My letter had been harsh and angry.  I had written it from the backdrop of being ignored for months and then reading another horrific story of a damaged child.  It was legitimate for him to call me out on this.  My anger should be focused on the correct target….the disgusting policy.  I’m committed to do better on this front.  The offensive letter had been posted on my website.  I decided to take it down, which I have.  The SP did not make this request.
  2. How are voluntary confessions to be handled?  I don’t know the answer to that question.  It does need to be addressed.  However, the vast majority of the youth interviews are NOT voluntary confessions.  13,000 of us are calling for the immediate stop of what is happening today.  Then, we can sort out how the few and far between voluntary confessions are handled.  Never-the-less, I still believe that they should not occur behind closed doors, all alone with the child.

The SP expressed concern about my change in attitude…the anger in my writings, the image of a roaring lion.  I didn’t respond in the moment.  But, how in the world can 1,000 stories NOT change my attitude?  If a person can read story after dreadful story and not be changed, they are capable of something I am not.  Yeah, you bet I’ve changed.  My heart has been broken a thousand times.  It’s now full of empathy and compassion.  While my belly is full of fire to protect our children.

Finally, my agenda had been aired….over and over again with no meeting of the minds.

Then the Stake President launched into his agenda.

SP:  Sam, do you want to be a member of the Church?

ME:  Yes.

SP:  Sam, are you an apostate?

ME:  No.

SP:  You are an apostate!

ME:  No, I’m not.  I’m speaking out about the need to change a policy.

SP:  You are an apostate!

He then flipped to the definition of apostasy in Handbook 1:

“Apostasy refers to members who repeatedly act in clear, open, and deliberate public opposition to the Church or its leaders.”

SP:  Sam, are you an apostate?

ME:  No.  I’m not speaking out against the Church of its leaders.  I’m speaking out against a policy.

SP:  You are an apostate.

He ended up reading the definition of apostasy a few more times.  It quickly became obvious that there was no debating this issue.  I had been officially declared apostate by the official Church representative.

SP:  You can’t continue speaking in public about this.  We will have to protect the good name of the church.

Take-aways

  1. In the face of hundreds of children being harmed…the Church will not change anything to protect this happening to our children in the future.
  2. I have officially been called apostate and told to be silent.
  3. With the repeated warnings of apostasy, the stage for my excommunication has been set.
  4. The SP had wanted my wife to be present.  I am so glad that she was not there to witness the thinly veiled threat made to her husband.

 My Public Response

  1. I agree that we need to protect the good name of the church.  How about that?  The Church’s reputation is being trashed by a dreadful policy that is doing severe harm to our children.  My fellow Mormons…join with 13,000 of us to protect the good name of the Church.  If this policy is not eliminated, those who didn’t speak up for change will be responsible for the bad name the Church is now accruing.
  2. I am not going to be silenced.  Our children’s protection is more precious than my membership.  I have made the temple covenant of sacrifice.  This is not a time to waffle on that promise.  If called to do so, I’ll sacrifice my membership for the benefit of the kids.
  3. Whatever the Church decides to do to me, I forgive them in advance.  My Stake President and Bishop are great men, having to operate within the system that they have been dealt.

P.S.  Dear Church leaders, If I got anything wrong, please let me know.  Unfortunately, I didn’t have a recording to assist in writing this piece.

 Links

Sign the Petition

Share Your Story

Read the Stories

See the Stories

 

 

 

 

 

A Win for Our Children!!!

Lion Protecting CubsTonight, an amazing message came in from a good friend.  He’s an active member in a far far away stake.  Immediately, I composed an e-mail to my Stake President with his message at the core.  At this time, I can’t share all the details out in public.

The stake has decided to implement every last demand of the petition!!!!   And more…stuff that’s related but wasn’t included in the petition.  I felt that if the petition was to be successful, it needed to be focused on one issue….children’s interviews.  This wise stake presidency totally gets it.

Just so amazing.

Here’s the e-mail I just sent to my stake president.

Dear President _________,

Tonight, an active friend sent me the following message:

(Sorry everybody…I don’t have permission to share the details of what’s happening in this far far away stake.  But just imagine this…all our wildest dreams about changes to how sexuality is approached with our kids.  It is truly amazing stuff.)     

Changes to protect our children are inevitable.  This wise stake president has taken action without directions from Church headquarters.  I’m aware of 2 other stakes who are considering similar changes.

Let’s do the same thing here.  Take the lead.  I’ll follow.  Your flock will be delighted.

Sincerely,

Sam

The Gloves are Off

LionTonight I sent this letter to my stake president and the newspaper.

Dear President ________,

Last Thursday, I held a news conference in Salt Lake City.  All the major media outlets showed up.  You’ll find the link below.

As I mentioned in a previous communication, media attention is coming to Houston.  In early February, I’m doing a press conference here like the one in SLC.  The media is very interested in this topic.  They are all stunned at what we are doing to our kids.

We have done massive harm to our children by our interview practices.  At this point, I’ve collected over 1,000 stories of horrid consequences.  Read them here.  Inform yourself as to why YOU should take action now.

Until last Thursday, I was giving bishops the benefit of the doubt.  That they are good men, with good intentions.

However, once we know that our interview protocol puts our children at great risk, we are NOT good men if we continue that practice.

From today on, if a bishop takes a child behind closed doors, all alone….he is not a good man.  He has harmed our children.

From this day forward, if a bishop asks a child about masturbation or any other sexual matter…he is not a good man.  He has harmed that child.

If you don’t understand how this damages our children, then inform yourself.  I have wanted to meet with you for months to discuss these issues.  I’d still like to do that.  But, I’m done waiting for the church, the ward or the stake to make changes.  Every week that goes by, further damage is done.  You are better than that.

I call on you to immediately halt one-on-one interviews with all children and youth.  Have a parent in all meetings with any child.

I call on you to immediately halt all questions about masturbation and other sexually explicit questions.  DO.NOT.SHAME.OUR.CHILDREN.

Order your bishops to protect the children…right now.  Have them cease these dangerous and damaging interviews.

You are the pastoral leader of a huge flock.  Be our pastoral leader.  Advocate for the children.  You might take some heat from your ecclesiastical superiors.  But, your concern should be for the well-being of the children in this stake, rather than compliance to directions from other men.

I have risked my reputation to speak out.  It’s affected my livelihood.  I’ve lost customers.  I’ve lost friends.  I’ve made the decision to die on this hill.  The hill of protecting children.  Ultimately, my reputation will remain intact.  Everyone outside of the church is appalled by what we are doing.  Many inside the church are also aghast.  Unfortunately, there is such fear in our Mormon culture, that those inside don’t speak up.

By not taking immediate action, you are also putting your reputation at risk.  No one outside of the church is going to think highly of a man who takes children behind closed doors and questions them about masturbation.  I no longer think highly of them, either.  I know the damages.  I have communicated them to every bishopric in the stake.  If you and they are not informed as to how we are harming our kids, you have no excuse.

Here’s my invitation.  Send a directive out to the bishops immediately.  Tell them to stop the interviews until things are sorted out.  Take the lead.  Don’t wait for a directive from the church.

Join me at the Houston news conference.  You make the announcement that you recognize the harms we have done and that we have changed course to never do this to our kids again.

The entire non-Mormon community will applaud your integrity and bravery.  The members in the stake will applaud you, too.  After all, these are their kids you are looking to protect.

You’ll likely receive some kind of censure from the church.  But, not from Jesus Christ.  He spoke unequivocally about our obligation to provide safety for our children:

“Whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”

Jesus made His point.  I am not going to be hanged by the millstone.  Let’s stand with Christ for our children’s sake on this one.

With determination,

Sam

Links in the e-mail

News conference

Read the Stories

 

 

Let the Shunning Begin

Shun

Tonight’s communique to my Stake President.

Dear President______,

I have an acquaintance with inside scoop about Church headquarters.  A couple of months ago, he informed me that a Church security person and a public relations person had been assigned to keep watch on me.

My inside source also told me that orders would eventually be sent down to my stake president to ignore me.  At the time, he speculated that you likely had already been told to shun me months ago.

All this, after a member of the church stalked my private Facebook conversations for months and reported them to you.  Kind of weird that both the Church and its members have a need to stalk, spy and tattle.  Doesn’t sound much like Christ to me.

I have now been told that you have received instructions regarding my “Letter to the Apostles.”  The directive is to disregard me and my concerns.  I don’t KNOW if it’s true.  However, the source has been dead on in the past.

If you are ignoring me, don’t worry about it.  You are in a difficult position between me, a mere mortal member, and the powerful Seventies.  The issue I’m bringing to the fore is a headquarters matter anyway.  Of course, I’d love to address it directly with them.  That’s one of the reasons I’ve been so transparent about everything.  So far, not a peep out of any of the ranks of leadership.  Sounds like shunning orders have been issued.

I find it ironic that the Apostles say, “Don’t send letters to church headquarters.  If you do, they will be sent back to your stake.”  Then, when I send my letter to the stake, the General Authorities tell the stake to ignore it.  Oh well….like always….I’ll just keep moving forward.

Here’s what I’m hoping about my stake president…Deep down in his good heart, he’s secretly rooting for my success in protecting the children.

All My Best,

Sam

Additional Resources

Dear Stake President-Please Forward My Letter to the Apostles

imageHi President ______,

I recently spoke with your executive secretary about setting up an appointment.  Of course, I realize that this is a very busy time of year.  I’d still like to speak with you directly.  In the meantime, here’s a heads up of what I hope to discuss.  All the issues revolve around the Petition to Protect the Children.  I sent you 2 emails about this petition and my concerns last November.

  1. The protocol for youth interviews in our stake.  I spoke with my bishop.  However, I still have a number of questions.
  2. I now know that explicit questions are being asked by our bishops.  Three members of our stake have reported that in 2017 they experienced interviews of such a sexually probing nature that they decided to leave the church.
  3. In the last few weeks there has been a firestorm of media coverage in Utah about the petition and our interview practices.  There is a story brewing that may very well be covered by major local TV news here in Houston  It could be highly embarrassing to our bishops.
  4. Finally, below you’ll find a letter that I’ve composed for the Apostles.  I’d really appreciate it if you would forward it to them. 
Thanks for your service & friendship,  Sam

_______________________________________________________________________

Dear Apostles,

One Thousand of us are going to march on the church office building.  We will present Ten Thousand signatures calling for the immediate PROTECTION OF OUR CHILDREN.

National media outlets will cover our March-for-the-Children.

Your policy of taking children behind closed doors is going to be exposed to the world.

Your training and approbation of local leaders to probe our children about masturbation and other sexually explicit details is going to be unmasked to the public.

You and the church are not going to look good.  Sitting bishops are not going to look good.

Do the right thing.  Stand up with us to protect our kids.  Stop these interviews IMMEDIATELY.  Avoid the PR nightmare that is fast approaching.

We are marching to protect our children.

Sincerely,

Ten Thousand Thundering Voices

Is It Happening in My Stake?

imageThis afternoon, I sent this e-mail to my Stake President and Bishop.  Both are very good men.

Dear President ______ and Bishop __________,

Tonight, I’m having an interview regarding the petition initiative:  Protect The Children–Stop Mormon Masturbation Interviews.  

I have been saying that I believed these questions were no longer being asked in our stake.  However, I was just sent a copy of a memo from the Seventies.  It gives instructions that “worthiness interviews need to be specific and explicit.”

As a result, I’d like to ask the question again.  Are stake and ward leaders following this instruction to pose “specific and explicit” sexual questions to our children, anywhere in the age range from 11 to 17? 

Tons of people have reported that this is happening all over the church.  Tonight, I’d like to confirm in advance of the interview whether or not it is happening in our stake.

As always, thanks for all you do,

Sam Young

To all who read this:  Join 1,917 Others to Protect our Children

SIGN…THE…PETITION!    Click HERE.

Other Resources

Testimonials of masturbation interviews.  Click HERE.

Testimonials of interviews about orgasm and sexual positions.  Click HERE.

How to talk to your kids about masturbation.  Click HERE.

Is masturbation a sin?  Click HERE.

 

Dear Bishop and Stake President…

imageFor those Voting Opposed In LDS General, Stake & Ward Conferences

Policies, major decisions, and other things that affect the lives of the Saints, are MANDATED to be presented for a vote at conferences.  Today, this law is not being followed.  As a result, I have decided to vote in disapproval (opposed) to the First Presidency and the Twelve Apostles.  They are solely responsible, both for the church policies and for the mismanagement of not putting crucial matters up for a vote.

If you are disposed to vote disapproval, I recommend an email communication be sent to your local leaders informing them of your vote.  This should be sent around the time of the conference in question.  Personally, I think it’s best to vote with our HAND during the conference and then to send the email.  However, sending the letter without attending the session, is a perfectly fine and honorable choice.

I also recommend that you sign the Common Consent Register—A Record of Those Who Disapprove.

Email Examples

Following are examples of e-mail communications that can be sent to your local leaders.  Feel free to use for ideas, templates or outright copying.

Simple

Dear Bishop_____ & President_______,

At General Conference today, I voted opposed when the First Presidency and the Twelve Apostles were presented.  I’m not necessarily opposed to these men serving in their respective callings.  However, they have introduced polices of which I  firmly disapprove.

I would be happy to discuss details of my concerns with you.

Please register my disapproving vote through whatever channel the church uses with respect to the law of common consent.

The church does much good.  I believe it can be much better.  Jesus has commanded the church leaders to ask for my opinion 4 times a year.  I have prayed, searched and pondered . . .  a lot!!  For many reasons, I believe and feel that it’s important to my Savior that I give a true and honest opinion when asked.

Thank you for your unselfish service to the Lord and the members in our area.  I know that you spend countless hours in your calling.

All My Best to You and Your Family,

Detailed

Dear Bishop_____ & President_______,

At General Conference today, I voted opposed when the First Presidency and the Twelve Apostles were presented.  I’m not necessarily opposed to these men serving in their respective callings.  However, they have introduced polices of which firmly I disapprove.

In the recent past, a new policy was announced regarding children of married same-sex couples.  I disapprove of excluding these children from the blessings of the gospel.  Inside my heart, here’s how I’m feeling.  The policy damages families, traditional and non.  Families have been driven out of the church, both traditional and non.  Our gay children have been hurt.   There are now reports that the message this policy sends is so hurtful that suicides have resulted.  Jesus said that we will be judged on how we treat “the least of these.”  Punishing “the least of these” is wrong.  We are denying baby blessings, baptism, the Holy Ghost, the priesthood, and the temple to the “the least of these.”  That doesn’t square with the teachings and example of the Savior.  I don’t believe this is what Jesus would want done in His church.

I would be happy to discuss details of my concerns with you further, if you’d like.

Please register my disapproving vote through whatever channel the church uses with respect to the law of common consent.

Our church does much good.  I believe it can be much better.  Jesus has commanded the church leaders to ask for my opinion 4 times a year.  I have prayed, searched and pondered . . .  a lot!!  For many reasons, I believe and feel that it’s important to my Savior that I give a true and honest opinion when asked.

Thank you for your unselfish service to the Lord and the members in our area.  I know that you spend countless hours in your calling.

All My Best to You and Your Family,

Here’s The Letter I Sent

I didn’t go into detail of the policies I disapprove of, as we have already discussed them at length:

Hi _____ & ______,

Just wanted to let you know that I voted in disapproval during conference this weekend.

I am not actually opposed to the first presidency or the apostles. Since they are not putting up major policies for common consent, my opposition to those polices is expressed when sustaining those who control the process.

My two issues are common consent and the exclusion policy for children of gay couples.

I loved many of the messages at this conference. It’s the best that I can recall. President Monson may be frail, but what a powerful communication he delivered!

I haven’t made a tally, but it seemed like concern over people leaving the church was a common thread. I would prefer that this wasn’t happening. But, it gave me super validation for the path that I’m on.

The work I’m doing can be and frequently is misunderstood. Sharp criticism from both active members and those who have left the church. My entire objective is to help both those in and out.

To those in and are questioning or about to leave?  We explore options of finding ways to stay. The problem here is that most people that I talk to have already made the decision to leave. Somehow, we need to find a forum where members can discuss before they’ve already reached their conclusions.

To those who have left?  Well, here’s the problem.  We are creating an army or enemies. Enemies who know and exploit our many, and uneccessary, weaknesses. Those who have left should be our friends, not our enemies. They seek validation, connection, and healing. These are good people.

Today, there are 12.5 million inactive and former members. Our 5 million active members are vastly outnumbered. 70% of Mormons are either resigned or inactive. And…we keep creating more disaffected, disappointed and disillusioned people for the other side. Not to mention the anger that often accompanies faith transitions.

Yet, I have now witnessed these good, formerly active members respond to love, friendship and understanding. A few weeks ago, a Relief Society president and High Priest group secretary came to the Talkeria. They were looking for suggestions on how they could reach out to those who are questioning or have left. Wow! Also in attendance were 4 resigned or about to resign members. One of the “about to resigns” had been his ward’s HP group leader as recently as last March. Hidden history, doctrine, and current policies pushed him, his wife and his 4 children out. What an amazing discussion we had!!! Our “enemies” helping local leaders of the church in which they no longer believe.

Things have got to change. Our leaders in SLC know it. They are working on it. They’re in a really tough spot. Things actually boil down to what is being done in the trenches. I’m digging trenches as fast as I can.

Thanks for all that both of you are doing in service of the Savior and especially for my friends.

All My Best, Sam

Other Resources

The Only True Hope for the Only True Church

Jesus Pleads His Case for Common Consent

Do We Love Jesus Enough to…

A Resister for Disapproval (Opposition)

LDS Website on Common Consent

Final Note

I know this takes great courage.  Every step of the way can be scary.  Raising your hand alone, all by yourself?  I know it’s scary.  I’ve now done it at each conference level this year.  Big fat butterflies every time.

Sending an email to the stake president…yeah that can be real scary.  But, how scared do you think the gay children are who are still hiding in the pews?

Putting your name on a public register of disapproval…scary?   You bet.  It scared me, too, when I hit the submit button two days ago.

There are many in our midst who are at risk and cannot speak up.  We are standing up, voting out, putting our name on the line for those who cannot fight for themselves.

“May we maintain the courage to defy the consensus.  May we ever chose the harder right.”  And that’s just what we are doing here.  Standing up for the marginalized, for the “least of these,” IS a noble and just cause.

Godspeed. Godspeed.  Godspeed.