Lean not unto thine own understanding…NOT!

The Creation of Adam by MichelangeloThe Salt Lake Tribune recently published an article entitled Polygamy lives on in LDS temples.  One of the comments got my attention.

“I found Dallin H. Oaks’ talk from this last General Conference appropriate and inspiring. We would do well to trust in the Lord more, and lean not unto our own understanding. Removing canon to make ourselves comfortable sounds a lot like fashioning a god after our own image.”  

Jasmin Gimenez Rappleye, Spanish Fork

Jasmin refers to a famous scripture found in Proverbs 3:5.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.”

Nonsense. At the ripe old age of 67, I am absolutely going to lean unto mine own understanding. Why?

For over six decades, I was schooled in the morality of the Mormon god. I believed in him. I leaned into his understanding.  Well guess what. That god wasn’t so great.  I was blinded as to his true nature.   Now I see him clearly. His character is steeped in racism, genocide, homophobia, misogyny and a weird focus on child masturbation practices.  Why in the world would I lean unto those understandings?  No way. Not anymore.

The commenter’s final sentence:

Removing canon to make ourselves comfortable sounds a lot like fashioning a god after our own image.”

This god WAS fashioned after the image of men.  Men of a particular nature…racist, homophobic and misogynistic. Men looking to justify their own genocides.  Men who have a weird proclivity to pry into how children touch themselves.   To me this is obviously a god invented in the image of man.

On this day 67 years ago, I took my first breath on the planet earth. On this day 67 years later, I celebrate a God fashioned in my own mind. My God is patterned after the teachings and example of Jesus Christ.

His parables, beatitudes and encouragements have always appealed to me.  Only in the last few years have I come to more fully appreciate His example.  And what an amazing examplar He was.

Today, I lean unto my own understanding which has been well seasoned with Christ’s preaching and prototype.  I have spit out the distasteful seasoning of my former god who was fashioned in someone else’s image.

Happy birthday to me. Life is good


The Day Mormon god Died

Boxers.jpgNovember 5, 2015!  That’s the day Mormon god died in my heart.  Today is the 4 year anniversary of his sudden death.

While driving to work exactly 4 years ago, I became aware of a new and highly offensive policy.  The Mormon Church didn’t announce it.  It was unceremoniously leaked.  The Church attempted to silently insert their new protocol into the secret Handbook of Instructions.  It’s reserved as eyes-only for bishops, stake presidents and general authorities.   The new policy barred children of gay parents from baby blessings, baptism, confirmation, the gift of the Holy Ghost, receiving the priesthood and temple attendance.  These severe restrictions could only be lifted when the child met all following conditions:

  1. Reached the age of 18.
  2. Moved out of the home of the gay parents.
  3. Disavowed the lifestyle of the gay parents.

I was immediately struck with anger and disappointment.  This was not the God that I loved and respected.  This was not the Christ I revered.  The new policy was as far away from the gospel of Jesus as one could get.  Yet the modern-day apostles pinned the blame on the Savior.  It still makes me sick to even type this.

HYPOCRITES of the highest order.  Christ was the epitome of standing up for the marginalized, the vulnerable and those on the fringes of society.  Here, the Mormon Church leadership was openly shunning children, the most vulnerable children.  And they had the gall to call it LOVE!  It was HATE!!!

That fateful morning, I was done with the Mormon church.  Over the previous year, I had already been troubled by the historical deceptions that were coming to light.  Somehow I managed to find a way around those problems and to stay in as an active member.  But this was way too much.  To openly disrespect the gospel of Jesus Christ and plainly lead the blindly following sheep into darkness.  Nope, I couldn’t countenance that.

So, I exited the freeway and bee-lined it to the local department store.   For the first time in 44 years, I purchased…boxers.  When I reached the office, I took off the Mormon underwear (garments) and planned to never return to an LDS service.  Pictured above is a pair of my colorful new underwear.  This picture was taken 2 weeks ago.  Out of sight but not out of mind, they have served me well these past 4 years.

That night my wife discovered my body was garment-less and boxer-bearing.  If you are or have been Mormon, you know that it would have caused a huge shock.  So much so, that divorce was mentioned.  Immediately, my garments went back on.  My marriage was more important than my damn underwear.

Until the excommunication, I clothed myself night and day in Mormon mandated skivvies.  Even though I continued to attend church, I was not going to remain silent.  While the policy flagrantly flew in the face of Christ’s teachings, I was determined to embrace His example in ways I had never done before.  He stood up openly to the power structure of His time.  Calling the church leadership out in harsh terms.  From November 5, 2015 until September 12, 2018 (Date of Excommunication), I voted opposed at every ward, stake and general conference.

On April 4 of this year, Mormon god changed his mind about this whole debacle.  At least that’s what the ‘Prophet’ told the world.  Nope.  Sorry buddy.  You aren’t going to sucker me into your made-up delusions again.  You, not God, concocted the original exclusion policy.  You recognized it was big trouble, decided to blame the whole thing on God and put it behind you.  If the meantime, children have died by suicide in the wake of this horrendous policy.  YOUR policy.

Mormon god has died a garment-less death in my heart.  Thank heavens.

Happy/sad Anniversary.