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The Home Front is Homogenizing

150410c_Parade_homecomingThis weekend, my wife and I went to Philly to participate in the sealing of our adopted grandson to my daughter and son-in-law.  My wife inside the temple, and I awaiting outside.  It really was a choice event.

Coming home today, we flew out on separate planes.  I arrived a few hours later than my wife.  When I got home, this conversation ensued:

PATTY:  You know I believe in the church and don’t want to leave it.  

ME:  Of course.  You know that I totally support you in that.

PATTY:  On the plane, I read 4 talks from the last General Conference.  I really liked the talks.  As I read, I reached the same conclusions over and over.  First, you are doing the right things.  Second, if I was ever questioned by the leaders about you, I could totally defend you.  Third, some might say that you are breaking your covenants.  You aren’t.  And God knows you aren’t.

Wow.  Just Wow.  What a great homecoming.

And this on the heels of a meeting I recently had with a prominent leader in our stake.  He told me this, “Sam, come back to church.  We need someone to speak out about the issues you are raising.”

17 thoughts on “The Home Front is Homogenizing”

  1. Wouldn’t it be loverly if you were the man to get that church to repent? It does take only one… millions can leave … but only one needs to be the mouth piece..

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    1. You know what they say, “With God, anything is possible.” I still believe it’s highly unlikely that my feeble efforts will cause the church to change. It’s a multi-billion dollar corporation with tons of powerful people with tons of vested interest. What I think will change is a person here, another there. One person standing up to protect their children from masturbation interviews. Another person seeking to keep their mixed faith marriage intact.

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  2. Great! Uchdorf’s women’s conference talk was also amazing if you realize he was using the analogy of WWII atrocities as steming directly from those who are judgmental and not accepting of others and calling them less than human if they do not agree with the official line. He was so directly aiming at HIS own, OUR own, leaders who do this, in church and govts, and those people following them blindly. Give that part a listen again. Changes are coming, and must. A fake ‘common consent” system is blasphemy leading to our line upon line problems, “Why do ye pollute the holy church of God?” (Mormon 8:38).

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  3. Hi, Sam!

    I am delighted that Patty is sounding more supportive of your perspective on the Church. That’s gotta be a significant stress reducer for you. It also shows that she is listening and understanding the essence of why you were forced by your own core values to see the Church differently lately than earlier in your life.

    Whoever the “prominent leader” in your stake is, he ain’t gonna continue to be prominent or a leader if he makes too much noise about open dialog about “the issues you are raising.” The Brethren will never tolerate open discussion of sensitive topics at the ward and stake level that are driving so many away from the Church.

    The reason is simple. Open discussion runs a high risk of shedding light on places where The Brethren must maintain darkness to keep their Mind Control Cult from imploding under its own weight. They must maintain the mythology that members leave because they “got offended” or “want to sin” or “just weren’t spiritual enough to keep the faith” or whatever else paints the Church totally blameless.

    The Brethren can do no wrong. Any discussion to the contrary constitutes evil speaking of the Lord’s anointed and shall not be tolerated.

    At this juncture, Sam, I am glad that you are staying close with the Church … regardless of your reasons. If nothing else, for members on thin ice, you will continue to appear as “safer” to talk to than someone who has left and moved on. The fact that you continue to wear your temple garments speaks volumes about how “un-dangerous” you are.

    At the end of the day, your most stunning attribute and source of your value to this planet is your magnificent heart and the authentic love, acceptance, and lack of judgment you feel for your fellow human beings. You consistently and naturally pass the WWJD test every time with flying colors.

    With The Brethren failing WWJD so much of the time, somebody’s gotta show ’em how its done!

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    1. Hi Gary,

      I always love hearing from you. I savor your good words. I laugh at your wonderful humor. Our friendship is cherished in my heart.

      You’re glad I’m staying close with the Church? Now, there’s music to my ears. I’m not hearing that very often. Except from my wife. I do need to put my reasons in writing. My first Sunday back should be this coming weekend…pending no Harveyesque disasters.

      You have an amazing story and I find myself frequently thinking about you.

      BTW, I am speaking at the 8th Annual Mass Resignation Event on Nov. 5th, the anniversary of the dreaded gay policy, There are 5 other presenters. All prominent ex-mos. Kind of odd that they want me to share the stage, being an active and believing member. I’ll let you know how it all goes.

      I love you my friend!

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      1. Thanks for your heartfelt reply, Sam … authentic as usual.

        Although my record is far from spotless when it comes to walking my own talk, at the end of the day that is the right thing to do. In your case, I am more fully aligning with this maxim we discussed in person:

        “When you love someone and want to be a true friend, do your best to figure out ‘where they are’ right now, and then GO TO THAT PLACE and just be there with them … wherever that place may be.”

        You are way more skilled at that maxim than I am, Sam, so you are my teacher-by-example in that regard.

        How cool that you are speaking at the MassResignnation event!

        We gotta coin a new term to describe you, Sam. Not TBM. Not ExMo. Hmmn … FixMo! That’s it! What do you think? You are consciously remaining a member with energetic intent to keep what’s good and fix the rest.

        You rock, Brother Dude!

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      2. Thanks for such an upbeat comment. But then, you are always upbeat. Tonight, I’m blue. Licking my wounds. Sometimes it all just seems so futile. So disappointing. Sometimes I feel a need to share. Now I have.

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  6. First…so glad to hear this news. That’s really great. Makes me happy. It can be a difficult and rocky road. I can report something similar. Things are in a much better place in my marriage too. We are figuring it out. She has come to grips with the fact that I will likely never come back to church. And I have (mostly) made my peace with the fact that she will likely never leave. Either way, she is an incredible woman. I am very fortunate. As you know, I wasn’t nearly so bullish on a positive outcome six months ago. 🙂

    Second, I hope you were treated well in my hometown of Philadelphia. The temple is beautiful. We went to the open house last September. My parents are temple workers (but only on Wednesday’s). I wish I had known you were going…I would have given some cheesesteak recommendations!

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    1. Dear Magic,

      So glad to hear that your home front is homogenizing, too. Outstanding news. The Talkeria that you attended is still one of my favorites.

      All my best, Sam

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      1. Thank you for your kind words, Sam. Being able to get the all the anger out that night without any fear…to others with a listening, understanding, and non judgemental ear…went a LONG way toward where my current mindset lies. Totally worth the trip. I would love a reprise before too long…any excuse to stand on Texas dirt is a good one. 🙂

        I don’t always comment on the things that you post (I’m not much of a social media type…here or on the other blogs and forums I frequent), but I read them all. And I love reading all the different points of view in the comments. If I am truthful, I align he most with Gary’s bold comments. Yes, what he said. 🙂 I also love Happy Hubby’s comments here and elsewhere. Janice’s contributions are useful and worthwhile and valid too. I enjoy the discussion. Keep up the good work.

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